Heart Strings & Ugly Crying

Thursday.  A day like any other. Rise. Skip AM workout. Work. But little did I know today was different.

"Come out in the backyard, I've got something awesome to show you", turned into the beginning of a whirlwind. 

If I haven't mentioned it before, M is an avid gardener. And by "avid" I mean he has the patience to keep a plant alive, and doesn't require instant results once planted unlike yours truly who kills every. single. plant. I've ever had. And ever "tended" to for that matter.  Elvira here folks. I love those plants to death. A submerged, watery death. I digress.

We head outside to see the "awesome".  I notice Rubin playing. But no Miles. Panic sets in. "Miles", I call out. Crickets. Check the yard. Nothing. Call again. Nothing. My stomach lurches as I settle into full emergency mode. Haul out the gate behind M, Rubin in tow. Rationale snaps me back to reality, I run back to grab both leashes, clip Rubin in, and set off down the alley. "Miles!" "Miles!"Nothing. Interrogate the few people I see outside, "Have you seen my puppy? Tears creep into my throat. As Rubin and I roam the neighborhood, me calling for Miles, Rubin being the stable one of us two, leading me down the street, stopping when I do, and being extremely obedient. I'm sure she picked up on my panic, because she has NEVER been that calm in her life. Once we circle back to M's house it hits me - my sweet, tubby little man is gone. To the end of his street is a busy road, I was sure he'd be struck by a car, or, because he is the cutest damn thing, was scooped up and is now someone else's puppy.  They were only 4 months old, and although micro chipped, did not have tags on their collar yet. It was too much. By the time I made back I was sobbing uncontrollably, my body on autopilot, only verbal enough to scream for Miles.  We regroup, I grab my cell, and head back out to the backyard to reinspect any exit points, to find any clue of his whereabouts. I don't remember the next few minutes. As the fear, grief and sick to my stomach feeling began to wash over me, out walks Miles from the garage. Perfectly happy, and completely oblivious (as always) to what was going on. I wept like a baby (just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes) as Rubin, Miles, and M looked at me like I'd officially lost my mind. I hugged Miles and Rubin harder and longer than they ever let me. And cried some more knowing they were both safe.  Then went to Petsmart the next day and got them tags. There is no worse feeling than the overwhelming  helplessness knowing you've lost something/someone you care about.  I'm just thankful there was a happy ending. 


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Ever lost a pet? How did you cope?



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